A Trademark Attorney’s Mission to get Jon Stewart High

No, I did not just publicly advocate drug use.  I am well aware of the Feds’ “War on Drugs,” and — more importantly — of lots of other ways to get high.  Jon Stewart, however, has had a recent fascination with getting high the old fashioned way.  Credit New York City Mayor Bloomberg, who supports decriminalization of possession of small amounts of marijuana.  In anticipation, Jon’s been keeping his soon-to-be-legal cup of weed — or “smokeable beer” as he referred (reefered?) to it — under his desk waiting for the new law to take effect.  At least, I think that’s what he’s waiting for to take effect.  I suppose it could be something else entirely, like . . . well, you know.

Like I said before though, there are lots of ways to get high . . .

Lots of things get me high . . .

Ever since my first encounter with The Daily Show, Jon Stewart has had high marks in my book.  But he’s not the only one getting high marks . . .

The USPTO trademark register lists 11,332 HIGH marks (trademark records that include the word “high”).  Of those there are 4,372 LIVE records, including 3,498 registered marks and 874 pending applications.  Only 8 HIGH marks were filed between 1860-1960 and 7 were registered during that time.  During the counterculture of the ’60s, we got slightly higher than we had during the prior 100 years: 8 HIGH marks were filed in the 1960s and 9 became registered during the 1960s.  As a nation we’ve been getting increasingly higher ever since:

Very few HIGH marks use the word in a euphoric sense, but according to the few that do, we’ve been getting high on motorcycles, America, speed, the hog, cooking, octane, PHP, life, and of course, grass.  But what about space?!?

Space travel gets you high literally and figuratively, doesn’t it?

While The Daily Show recently was off the air for two weeks, I devoted that half hour each night to planning a space mission for Jon and me.  After all, he wrote Earth for space anthropologists who come to our planet long after we’ve annihilated ourselves and just listen to him share his thoughts about space . . .

Knowing Jon’s childhood ambition of “spatial entrepreneurship,” I just had to send him to space.  However, since he’s from New York City (at sea level) he first had to spend some time at my house at Lake Tahoe, which is at 6,500 feet in the Sierra Nevada mountain range.  Then I had to take him on a test run — slow slog of a hike, really — from my house to the top of Rose Knob Peak at 9,800 feet to acclimatize and make sure he wasn’t afraid of heights.  Not only did he handle the altitude well, he seemed to really enjoy himself.  When I saw how much fun he had flying above Tahoe, I knew it was time to send him 110,000 feet (20 miles!) into space . . .

To see how Jon got so high, check out this video of the launch of Captains Kirk & Picard, the mission that paved the way for Jon to go to space.

People get high in many different ways.  For me, one of the greatest highs would be to work for Jon Stewart as a researcher, writer and/or contributor.  My intention is for this space mission to launch my career as an employee of The Daily Show so I can further spread my knowledge about IP law and corporate social responsibility.